Hi!

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Trying2010
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Oct 28, 2014 5:33 pm

Hi!

Post by Trying2010 »

Hi everyone! I'm not sure how all this works-still figuring it out. But I wanted to introduce myself: I was formerly a member of a very conservative CoC where we used one cup for communion, believed you could never miss a Sunday morning church service, and as a woman I could never cut my hair. I "converted" when I was dating my now husband in 2010. I am 27 now but I still have major internal struggles with how disappointed my family is in me and all. As an example: I really want to cut my hair but I'm still so scared of what my parents/family will think. Which is pretty sad for a 27 year old I guess. I don't know anyone who has come out of this type of environment like me and I found this forum looking for some sort of online support group. I'm hoping that I can find some encouragement here or maybe somehow help someone else who has the same struggles! Thank you all!
zeek
Posts: 1073
Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 5:46 pm

Re: Hi!

Post by zeek »

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Last edited by zeek on Sun Sep 04, 2016 1:50 am, edited 1 time in total.
B.H.
Posts: 4411
Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 8:26 pm

Re: Hi!

Post by B.H. »

I was never an actual member of a one cup church but used to visit one a lot to support my friend who was their preacher and one of the elders. I visited so much people thought I had switched congregations. I am a guy but I bet having all that long hair is uncomfortable and hard to manage.
The philosophers have only interpreted the world, in various ways; the point is to change it.----Karl Marx
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agricola
Posts: 4780
Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 10:31 pm

Re: Hi!

Post by agricola »

Hi Trying - welcome to the board.
History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That's why events are always reinterpreted when values change. We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices.
Grace
Posts: 48
Joined: Sat Oct 11, 2014 6:35 am

Re: Hi!

Post by Grace »

Welcome Trying,

I think you found a good place here. I haven't been here very long, but it has helped me. I understand not wanting your family to be disappointed. I still am not open with them about my faith, which isn't CoC. Since they know you have converted, I would say you have to do what you want with your life. Remember their concern is out of love, but it is your life. You have been brave to leave. You will find support here.
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bnot
Posts: 229
Joined: Sat Oct 11, 2014 3:22 am
Location: Southern California

Re: Hi!

Post by bnot »

Welcome to the forum! You'll find plenty of support here :D
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lvmaus
Posts: 127
Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 3:59 pm
Location: California

Re: Hi!

Post by lvmaus »

Welcome ... Wow, never realized that it was considered a sinful act for a woman to cut her hair in any CoC. :shock: My first impulse would be to cut my hair short and start visiting family and old church friends.
Unity in diversity
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Moogy
Posts: 1211
Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 7:20 pm
Location: on the ranch near Eldorado, Texas

Re: Hi!

Post by Moogy »

My COC grandmother thought it sin for a woman to cut her hair. But she was born in 1895! ;)
My mother never cut her own hair (never even a trim), out of respect for her mother, but Mama didn't think it was sin. As a result, I never cut mine until my older sister was grown and married. I went for a summer visit, and she cut my hair (a tiny trim with bangs) and let me shave my legs, finally!
Now my hair is longer than it ever got while in the no-cutting phase of my early life. :D
Moogy
NI COC for over 30 years, but out for over 40 years now
Mostly Methodist for about 30 years.
Left the UMC in 2019 based on their decision to condemn LGBT+ persons and to discipline Pastors who perform same-sex marriages
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lvmaus
Posts: 127
Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 3:59 pm
Location: California

Re: Hi!

Post by lvmaus »

Moogy wrote:My COC grandmother thought it sin for a woman to cut her hair. But she was born in 1895! ;)
My Southern Baptist Grandmother, also born in the 1890's, never cut her hair and lived to be almost 100; perhaps, like the OT Samson, there's some good reasoning for the long locks. :?
Unity in diversity
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KLP
Posts: 2757
Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 4:47 pm

Re: Hi!

Post by KLP »

Hi and welcome. If you are OK with cutting your hair then I would suggest you ask your hubby as to his preference and go from there. No one else should really get a say in the matter IMO. The same Bible also says we are to leave our parents and "cleave" to our spouse. Women get the added bonus of being able to claim being in submission...so you can always claim your hubby made you cut your hair? LOL
Isn't the world wonderful...I am all for rational optimism and I am staying positive.
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