Ex-Church of Christ Support Board

I know many non parents skip Mother's/ Fathers day.Maybe that's one reason many turn from churches. It's geared to families with kids. I was for one glad Co C didn't really emphasize it that much.

I'm married but no kids and I can't imagine being childless and the church has mothers or fathers to stand and you may be the only one or two sitting. However, the one my parents go to gave potted plants.I know they might mean well but much of society in general isn't aware of the pain that some holidays trigger for childless/infertile and those who lost kids. It's like an exclusive club you can't join.

I do call my mom but it doesnt mean I don't feel a bit of sadness. Any other times of the year I'm cool Many people don't have kids. Anyhow I guess you can't win with holidays . Regardless of the day they will always have a negative experience for someone. It's just that they don't have religious origins in the first place.

My coc didn't even mention the day yesterday. I was very glad (and I have kids). Last week was a sermon about why women shouldn't have leadership roles in the church, so if they had done a sermon on women being good mothers and housewives on Mother's Day (as has happened before), it would have felt like an abuser saying, "Honey, I love you so much" after beating the woman the week before.

I've not attended a coc who had people stand up. On occasion, we've had a member bring corsages for the moms. That wasn't church sponsored though.

I never thought about how recognizing mothers could make childless people feel badly.

Everybody has a mother, even KLP...but I skipped the mother's day sermon. Probably will skip father's day too. Generally too much schmaltz for my liking.

I have no kids. You can celebrate father's day all you want. It doesn't bother me. I just look around and see all the men in their mid forties with all the gray hair and I look at mine in the mirror later and not see a one. No kids no grey hairs.

B.H. wrote:I have no kids. You can celebrate father's day all you want. It doesn't bother me. I just look around and see all the men in their mid forties with all the gray hair and I look at mine in the mirror later and not see a one. No kids no grey hairs.

I'm in my 40's with 4 kids. My house is a total zoo. Surprisingly, no gray hairs yet.

B.H. wrote:I have no kids. You can celebrate father's day all you want. It doesn't bother me. I just look around and see all the men in their mid forties with all the gray hair and I look at mine in the mirror later and not see a one. No kids no grey hairs.

Commendable, BH!! Kids should be very much wanted, not regretted, when they are brought into the world.

FinallyFree wrote:I never thought about how recognizing mothers could make childless people feel badly.

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Yes especially if you belong to pro-natal religious groups.They also could have had abusive/neglectful moms then there are moms who lost children.

DH and I don't have kids and he has been gray a long time. In fact, He was gray when I met him.

The sermon on women and leadership isn't surprising.

roddma wrote: I'm married but no kids and I can't imagine being childless and the church has mothers or fathers to stand and you may be the only one or two sitting. However, the one my parents go to gave potted plants.I know they might mean well but much of society in general isn't aware of the pain that some holidays trigger for childless/infertile and those who lost kids. It's like an exclusive club you can't join. .

Mother's day and Father's Day are about your own parents, though. Not about someone being a parent. It's about honoring one's own parents.

My Presbyterian church had so many complaints about Mother's Day, that they now don't even mention it in the church program that is handed out on Sunday morning. Nor is it mentioned in the sermon at all, not even a "Happy Mother's Day" from the pastor. I find that quite sad that they had to go to that extreme.

I skipped church on Mother’s Day for many years. Even though we had one child, we wanted more and could not have more. A Mother’s Day celebration was too much of a reminder of that loss.

I am past that now. This year I skipped church Mother’s Day and every other Sunday since my back surgery in April. I will get a doctor’s note so I won’t have to do the walk of shame for forsaking the assembly. (Just kidding. Methodists don’t do that walk.)